We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Randomize