no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
