My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Lo siento on account of my penis...
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
