I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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