My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
