i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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