there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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