doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
