Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Randomize
