i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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