it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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