I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
You need a sexual gate keeper
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
