Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
So much Jack, so little girl.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
