Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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