I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
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