we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize