Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
