The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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