jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
Randomize
