she was so not down for the gang bang
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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