So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
