You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
