she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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