I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
