I have demons in me.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize