that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
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