Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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