Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
