There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
