Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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