You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Houston, we have a blender
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
