It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Best friends brother. Beat that.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
