Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
