is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
