Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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