As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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