Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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