yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
