More tranny stories later!
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
