im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
