ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
