I wanna bring you to show and tell
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
