I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
