strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
