I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
