I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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