That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
