so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Drunk is not a location!
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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