What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
How external is "for external use only"?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
