Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
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