if you like me you must not know who I am
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
